'Magpies Stole My Diamonds, This Bastard World's Stealing My Dream'.

I Can't Settle.

Settling Means Slowing To A Halt.

For Now Anyways.

I Just Don't Have The Time For Now.

Friends And Family Mostly Settled And Happy, That's Great.

It's Right For Them.

But Not For Me.

There's Too Much To Do And Not Enough Time.

The Country's A Joke.

And Not Many See The Punchline Coming.

I Took The Dive, And So Far I Haven't Been Dragged Down.

I Started My Business.

Here's The Shameless Plug.

www.facebook.com/cjmagpiesco

It May Not Be Much Right Now,

But It's Mine.

I Can't Wait For Bigger Things.

Better Things.

The Stupid Thing Is That This Silly World Completely Revolves Around Money.

I Can't Get Stuff Done Because Of The Lack Of It.

When I'm Not Working, I'm Crafting.

When I'm Not Crafting I'm Applying For Jobs.

All Surrounded By Housework. 

Bitch, Bitch, Moan, Moan.

Writing It Won't Change My Current Sittuation.

But It Don't 'Arf Make Me Feel Better.

People With Stupid Wise Words Are Starting To Piss Me Off.

Uh-Oh I Hear The Hypocrite Sirens Blaring.

But Seriously. 

If I Wanted Wisdom, I'd Have Gone To A Wizard.

People Who've Got It Good Can't Tell The Grafters The Ways Of The World.

And Vice Versa.

Truth Is You Don't Know What Goes On Behind Closed Doors Or Glassy Eyes.

Dream, Dreamer, Dreamy, To Dream.

Why Not?

I Find A Dream Is Most Often A Damn Sight Better Than What This Reality Lark Has To Offer Most Of The Time.

I Keep Having These Heart Stopping Moments Where I Remember How Fucked It All Is.

It Makes My Insides Ache.

Then I See Something Shiny,

Panic Overted.

I Have Too Much To Give, Too Many I Care About, Too Much I Do For What?

Exactly, I Have No Idea What I'm Doing And Why.

Apart From I Know How Too Much I Have To Give.

Which Is Fine Because It's Going To Be Great.

But To Get Over Feeling So Deflated And Unappreciated.

Isn't So Great.

But A Few Kind Words Of Reassurance From A Best Friend,

Puts A Smile On My Face.

As Does The Thought Of Reunions Possibly Coming Soon!

It's Mad To Love People So Far Away,

To Miss Them So Much It Hurts.

'Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fond...'

Bullshit, It's Makes It A Pain In The Right Royal Behind.

Above All The Mumbo Jumbo.

I Want To Get Away, 

I Want My Friends.

I Want Laughter,

I Want Long Conversations.

I Need Inspiration.

Peace Out. xXx

Repetitive Rant. Don't, Just Don't.

So Apparently It's 2012.

I Feel Like I've Lost A Year.

And I Haven't Bloody Learnt Anything Have I?

Waste Of Sodding Time.

But Yet Again,

It's My Own God Damn Fault.

I Defend People Until The End,

When I Realise They Weren't Worth It & I Wasted My Time.

Wore My Silly Ticker On My Sleeve,

Then Gave It To The Wrong Bastard.

Went All Out On Those,

Then Remembered They Weren't Worth The Money.

Again.

Held Back And Kept My Mouth Shut,

Because I Thought I Was Right Too.

Brilliant.

I Can't Keep Doing It.

Literally My Body Can't Do It.

The Aches, The Pains, The Tears.

Stuff YOU Won't Know Because You Never Take The Fucking Time To Care.

Just Shrug Me Off Or Ignore Me.

Probably Easier, Right?

Fair Play.

But Nah You're Alright,

I'll Keep Pretending It's Fine.

Fuck It, I Haven't Got The Time.

It Shatters Me To Be Around People That Care.

Because It Brings Back That Shy, Awkward, Cautious Girl.

That Doesn't Know Any Better.

But Knows You Don't Care As Much As Acquainted Strangers.

Gloom And Doom Aside.

I'm Bloody Lucky.

I Have People Who Love Me And Take Care Of Me.

Bring Out That Confident, Happy, Smiley Girl.

But I'll Always Get That Twang.

Like Being Stabbed By A Icicle.

Not That I Know What That's Like, But Yeah.

So I Have One Hell Of A Week Coming Up.

Starting With A Mega Sleepover With 2 Lesbinim Builders,

Cake & MEGA PASS THE PARCEL!

Then Countdown To Nantwich.

Where I Get To Introduce My Johns To A New World.

So Fucking Excited.

Don't You Dare Ruin Any Of It. xXx

Cross My Heart And Hope To Di...YOU THIEVING BASTARD.

Don't Put Yourself Out For People.

It's Not Worth The Arse-Ache.

Halloween Is My Favourite Time Of Year.

The Whole Irony Of The Masks.

It's Taken Me Well Over A Month To Find Words.

My Skeleton Is Falling Apart.

My Skull Bones Hurt From Over Thinking Possible Scenarios.

My Jaw Bones Hurt From Keeping My Mouth Shut Tight.

My Neck Bones Hurt From Holding This Head Up High.

My Rib Cage Hurts From Being The Only Thing In The Way Of Pulling The Ticker Out And Throwing It Away.

My Back Bones Hurt From Holding My Shoulders Back, Bum In, Tits Out.

My Hip Bones Hurt From Trying To Avoid The Duck Waddle.

My Knee Bones Hurt From Stopping Me Falling Down On Them.

My Leg Bones Hurt From Trying To Keep Up With You.

If You Didn't Know Me You'd Probably Think That's The Only Part Of Me Left That's Real.

Safe To Say Sometimes I Feel The Same.

My Hair Is Dyed And Mostly Fake.

I Glue On My Eyelashes.

Draw On My Lips.

My Chest Is Pushed Up Within An Inch Of It's Life.

My Nails Are Acrylic.

My Waist Is A Corset.

My Butt And Shape Wear Knickers Are BFF's.

My Legs Covered In Nylons.

Stilletoes For Height.

'You'd Be Suprised How Much It Costs To Look This Cheap' - Dolly Parton.

Will Always Be My Favourite Statement.

Good Friends Are Like Your Favourite Expensive Perfume.

Get Them Out On Special Ocassions.

Not As Often As You'd Like To.

Don't Use Too Much As You're Scared Of Running Out.

Reliable, Long Lasting And Beautiful.

However That Knock Off Petrol Based £1 Off The Market Jobby?

Leave It There, Where It Belongs.

I'm Not Saying Because It Fucking Stinks.

Or Because It's Probably Going To Give You A Rash.

But Because It Doesn't Deserve To Be Anywhere Near You.

Invest In Something Special.

Someone. xXx

Green, Not Quite Pea But Not Quite Ivy.

A Lovely Old Man Has Recently Made It To The Skies.

I Hope He Found Her.

I'll Miss His Morris Minor With The Falling Out Indicators.

Or How One Time Dad Was Fixing It While We Had Happy Meals In The Back Of The White Alfa Romeo (With Purple Velvet Seats, Total Whitesnake).

And He Gave Us Dolly Mixtures And We Ripped The Bag And He Said 'Oh No, You Can't Tell Dad I Gave You Them. You'll Get Me In Trouble.'

She Left First, But I Never Saw Him Sad.

What A Happy Gentleman.

It's Nice To Think They Go To Better Places.

He Definately Did.

Why Have I Only Just Now Realised What I've Been Missing Out On.

Places To Go, Things To See, People To Meet.

Waster.

Appreciator?

I've Missed Those Miraculous Things By Being Selfishly Blind.

But One Bright Spark Conversation.

Was Like Putting My Glasses On.

Wind In Your Hair, Sounds Of The Sea.

Makes The Drama Non Existent.

If Even Only For One Hour Fifteen Minutes, Roughly 7 Miles.

It Seems I'm Forever Making These Defining Posts.

Very Quite 'Me Against The World'.

Very Sickly.

Hi My Name Is Charlie Please Wipe Your Feet.

I'm So Bottled Up To The Point Where It's Overwhelming To Hear Talk.

Weird To Know Someone Wants To Listen.

But I Can't Talk The Bastard Waterworks Beat Me To It.

Fucks Up My Make Up.

Reduces My Voice To A Whiney Bitch Shrill Tone.

And The Shakes.

Nothing Feels Safe Right Now.

The Only Secure Thing I Can Feel Right Now Are These Soft, Warmy, Ice Cream Coloured (Neapolitan) Socks.

Keep My Feet Safe From Frostbite And Plugs.

Amen To That.

Everything Feels Like An Irritating Little Brother Joke At The Moment.

Or A Stupidly Tanned Gameshow Host With Teeth Too Big For His Head.

'You Could Of Had... BUT WE DON'T WANT TO GIVE YOU THAT.'

Or 'Here You Go Have It *Reaches* JOKES! No Really You Can Have It *Reaches* AHAHAH PROPER JOKES.'

Ugh Get Bent.

You Are A Problem.

Not You, Or You.

You Move To The Left, Yep There.

You.

You Pretty Much Gave Me The Solution.

Didn't Even Have To Think Once.

But Now I Want To Love You.

Not You, Or You.

Now You Move Over To The Right, Yup Just There.

You.

I Wake Up In The Foulest Mood, See Your Face.

Which Then Keeps Mine Smiling All Day.

Too Perfect.

The Little Things.

Obstacles Schmobstacles.

Insert Projectile Vom Here.

Followed By Tacky Lyric.

Meh Fuck It I'm All Smiles :)

Flipside. xXx

I'll Play Defeat Because Apparently I'm Not Worth The Battle.

How Can You Feel So Defeated When There Wasn't A Lot To Fight For In The First Place?

The Hair Of A Housewife.

Lips Of A Whore.

Eyes Of A Child.

Thoughts Of A Wreck.

The Hope Of A Saint.

A Voice With A Reason.

Qualities Or Quantities?

The Benefit Of Few Is That You Find Your Diamonds,

Let The Rough Fall.

If You're Smart Enough.

I Haven't The Time.

For Repetition Like This.

I Say Repetition Like It's Not My Fault.

But It Must Be.

If It Keeps Happening.

Coincidence Is Just A Word That Conveniently Appears To Cover Up The Fact That I'd Rather Shift The Blame.

I'm Done Crying Away 2 Day Mascara.

(Waterproof? This Shits Bulletproof)

Turn A Page.

Scribble Down A Rough Morbid Looking Design.

Twist It, Censor It.

Listen To Those Fixing Songs.

Brush Your Teeth.

End It With A Smile.

Favourite Pijamas.

Set All 3 Alarms, Just Incase.

High 5 My Favourite Brother Off To Bed (He's Too Cool For Hugs Now)

Fighting Cat Noise Is The Worse Sound Ever.

Best Noise Is The Most Annoying Noise In The World From Dumb & Dumber.

How Is It That In Moments Like This Sparks Ideas.

I Can Spend Days Focusing Pointlessly At Empty Paper.

Just Takes An Unnecessary Upsetting Situation.

Then I Find Anything That Has The Ability To Paper Base Imortalise.

Silly Little Sketches.

That Could Contain Potential, Mostly Easy Fashion.

Statement Lines, Cuts And Meanings.

The Trick Is This Jibberish Doesn't Even Have To Make Sense.

Conveiniently Placed Clever Words.

Not Necessarily With Feeling.

And I Could Be Considered Someone Else.

Why Is It When You Need To Sleep You Can't.

When You Can't You Pretty Much Need To.

Babysitting And Knitting Had That Effect Last Night.

On Leaving There Was Just Enough Time To Notice The Pretty Rain.

While Running To The Car, Discovering It Wasn't My Car.

(Who Else In Their Right Mind Would Have A Turquoise Nissan Micra 'Passion', Bastards.)

The Drive Home Isn't Worth The Time To Put The Radio Face On.

But Just Enough Time To Sing A Favourite Chorus From An Amber Pacific Song.

Then The Brief Flash Of Fear That Ran Through Me While Standing In A Dark Garden.

Blind Panic As I Couldn't Get The Bloody Door Unlocked.

Scared Of The Zombies Or That Bitch Vicious Albino Cat From Over The Road Might Get Me.

The Latter Being More Probable.

(Two Fucking Pairs Of Tights I Could Never Wear Again, Bitch).

Money Amazes Me.

Not The Idea Of It Or The Use.

But The Object Itself.

It Must Be The Most Travelled Thing I Know Of.

I Thought This While Working The Till.

How Many Times Money Exchanges Hands In The Space Of My 4 Hour Shift Is Impressive.

But In The Space Of A Day Blows My Mind.

Like Mermaids, Love Is A Myth.

I'm Stupidly Surrounded By It.

But Unlike Mermaids, I Still Don't Believe In It.

Time To Wash The Car With No Shoes On. xXx

Mayday.

What's Real.

Who's Real.

Are You?

Am I?

Is That?

Or This.

Your Funny.

You've Said I'm Cute, But She's Cuter Right?

I'm Just Possibly Convenient Looking.

Ever Feel Like Your Walking Or Even Running Away From Something,

But Your Legs Can't Take You Fast Enough?

Ever Find Wisdom In The Weirdest Places?

Crappy Pop Songs.

I've Been Dancing And Swishing My Fake Hair Along To The Same One For Days.

4 Verging On 5.

I Know All The Words, All The Drops And Nearly The Dance Moves.

Everytime I Hit Play To Listen Again.

It Gets Abit Better.

It's Called 'Not Your Birthday'.

And It Involves You 'Partying Like It's Not Your Birthday'.

Has Some Genius Lines Such As,

'Quit Your Bitchin' Move Your Feet'

And

'This Song Is For Anyone Who's Having The Worst Day,

You Gotta Party Like It's Not, Party Like It's Not.'

- 'Like It's Not Your Birthday'.

'Because Nobody Gives A Damn About The Day That You Were Born.'

I Could Be Talking About Some Meaningful Song With An Actual Message.

But Where's The Fun In That?

I Want To Dance,

And This Hair Won't Swish All By It's Own.

I'm Dreading The Moment When I Get Bored Of That Song.

I Say It Every Time,

'OMG I'M NEVER GOING TO GET SICK OF THIS SONG'.

Low And Behold,

I Get Sick Of It Over Time, Every Time.

My Use Of Grammar Is Improper.

But It's Comfortable.

I Do Hope That's Not What's OFFENDING You.

No, Sorry Wait It's My PERSONAL ABUSE That's Doing It.

Oh Behave.

If All You Have To Do Is Report My Silly Little Ramblings,

I'd Be Worried.

I Haven't Gone Out Of My Way To Be Bitchy Or Say Names.

But How Do You Know This Is About You Or Affecting You.

You Should Be So Lucky ;)

You Know Where The Best Place To Sing In My House Is?

Mum And Dad's En Suite.

Central Located, Minimal Echo.

The Sky Definately Didn't Dissapoint This Morning.

Odd Events On Friday The 13th.

Paranoia.

It's Won Me Battles.

And Lost Me Love.

But What Fuels It.

You Are Unknowingly Rubbing Salt In A Wound.

But Then It's Unnecessary For Me To Be A Bitch.

What's In A Face.

Apart From The Usual Features.

If I'm A Blank Canvas.

Do My Expressions Paint Me?

What's Behind A Face.

Stuff I Can't Imagine To Begin To Understand.

Thoughts, Feelings, Hopes & Dreams.

The Usual Features.

Lost In My Thoughts.

I Made Them In My Head So That Makes Them Mine.

You Certainly Can't Buy Them For A Penny.

Mumbo - Jumbo.

I Don't Think I Can Even Make Sense Of These After A Point Now.

Lost In My Words More Like.

When Does It Make Sense.

Will It Ever.

Or Does It Even Have To?

Surely Unexplained Is More Exciting?

Unless Your Most Haunted.

That Shit Was Only Scary 13 & Alone...

Okay I Lie, I May Get Scared On The Odd Occasion.

Depends On Location.

Fakeness Aside.

Does Anyone Else Find The History Exciting?

The Stories, The Characters.

Just Me Then.

Also, What's Meaningful When It Comes To Words.

Depends Who Wrote Them?

Who Spoke Them?

In What Context?

Depends On Location?

It's Taken A Week To Complete This.

Just Couldn't Find The Right Words To Play With.

Wordplay, A Play On Words.

That's A Funny Term.

Terminology.

A Term For The Term That Means Term. No? No.

Pfft, Where's My Sketchbook. xXx

'She's Been A Crazy Dita'.

Tonight All I Want To Do Is Dance.

I Don't Know What It Is.

But I Can't Stop Moving My Fingers.

Like Thing From The Adams Family.

I Can't Wait To See The Sky Tomorrow.

On The Way To Work For 7am.

Im Stoked.

To Say The Very Least.

At Work Today Studying 'Manual Handling'.

I Notice In Bold Writing.

'GET A GOOD GRIP'.

Excellent Words.

That Come At A Convenient Turning Point.

It's Reassuring.

To Most It Would Be Unnoticed.

To Some It Has Meaning.

What's The Point Of Getting A Grip If Its Not Good?

Jibberish.

Words Typed In Lines Making Little Sense.

Purely Because My Fingers Can't Rest.

I Don't Necessary Know What To Say.

But Writing Seemed To The Right Thing To Do.

I Have Pins And Needles Now.

This Can't Be Good.

Why Do They Call It Pins And Needles?

It's Such A Difference What Good Company Can Make.

I Know Some Pretty Incredible Human Beings.

Impecible Personalities.

The Most Beautiful People You Could Ever Know.

The Luckiest Girl.

Who Has Finally Got A Grip.

A Good One. xXx